It’s one of those times again.

It’s one of those cycles where you go for a long time without feeling the need to be immersed in the whole metaphysical world, and then suddenly… you feel some sort of huge draw. That’s where I’m at again… feeling the draw, not knowing what to do about it.

I can’t put my finger on it, as usual. It’s just a somewhat intense urge, like a 7 on a scale out of 10 (I hear you laughing, Crystal), that I just can’t pinpoint. I’ve been going to various otherkin chats again lately, though it isn’t specifically otherkin I’m seeking. I know that much for sure; I’m still no longer really interested in such communities. What I’m looking for is people of a similar mind about the world.

Why?

I wish I knew.

I hoped this post would help me somewhat, but I’m feeling a little confused still. I’m waiting for something to happen, but I just don’t know what it is.

I was out trying to find a Halloween costume once again. We were searching vintage stores and I just couldn’t find anything! I was in one store waiting for a friend, I think it was Tina, to come back from somewhere and I found two really pretty little dresses, but they weren’t costumes so I put them back when she got there and we went back outside.

There was another shot up the way in the same strip mall so we walked over there. I found a set of stairs to the store that were really tall, had no railing, and weren’t attached, and my mom was a bit upset that I was crawling around on them, but I didn’t get hurt as I came down on the other side.

As we get to the front of the thrift store, Tina goes inside but my parents walk around outside, because in the brand new gravel in front of the store they find some really nice agates. I stay with them and we start looking at the rocks. I see a really nice bunch of striped rocks, but suddenly I see an arrowhead.

I pick it up and show my dad in surprise; but as I look down I see there are more and more. There are literally thousands of arrowheads on the ground here from all different time periods it seems, and soon I have a bowl from somewhere in which I’m putting all these arrowheads. We’re just amazed, and I’m so pleased!

We get home and I show my sister, who is also amazed. I tell her that yay, this means I can use the book my history teacher once gave me (he did in the waking world) for identifying arrowheads! I get the book from its shelf (the living room is my parent’s living room but is set up in a way it hasn’t been in ten or more years) and I sit at the dining room table with my sister.

We look through the arrowheads and I explain to her how to match them up. We find so many different kinds, and we even find this big flat polished disc of what seems to be bright blood red labradorite. As we look it seems something bad is coming, some kind of deadly fog or dust; I’ve dreamt about this before.

We drop what we’re doing and panic, getting up to close all of the windows and doors in the house. I run to the back of the house, and know we have to close all the curtains as well or we won’t survive. I get everything all closed except for the back door, which for some reason won’t close right. It rattles in the wind and I pull it open, seeing that it’s bar locking mechanism is broken and it can’t hold itself by it’s doorknob in the severe wind.

It’s still sunny out but I know it won’t last more than a few minutes, but I open the door a bit and thread its chain lock through something, slamming it shut again so that I can attach its little hook to something. I do this and the door is actually quite secure, and I feel a little bit safer. I worry that this fog/dust thing will leak inside somehow still, but as I come into the living room, we all sit down as darkness falls and worry in the living room.

I tell my mom that I had trouble with the back door but I figured it out, and she goes to look. I knew I shouldn’t have said anything because I didn’t want anyone to go to the back of the house and look, but there she went anyway. The door is, of course, secure and I manage to convince her not to try opening and closing it again as the fog is on us, so we go back to the front of the house.

As we do someone asks “is it safe to open the windows yet?” and I scream that no, of course it isn’t safe! Yet all the windows are suddenly open. I scream and try to close them, but the skies are sunny and somehow the fog is just gone.

I’m outside now, not sure why, struggling to find a place that I can hide in this old barn and train yard before the fog comes back again, if it does. I’m just running around and can’t seem to find a room with a roof on it that also has a door or window that closes. I am seeing things through the eyes of someone who is perhaps on a bad acid trip or something for awhile, seeing scenes of horrible things that aren’t happening reflecting back to me from windows and shiny surfaces, but in the dream I tell myself to ignore it.

I finally find a promising set of rooms that all wind into each other in the dark when I freeze; I hear someone else. Two young men are walking around in here, and I realize that when I ran to this building from my house in the dream, there were police cars and sirens outside and that they were shooting at this place. Someone was shot at and killed as I ran inside, but I kept exploring anyway, forgetting about the police. I knew that these two guys were criminals that they were looking for.

I listened to them chatter, and then when they finally saw me trying to hide in the shadows, they tried to explain that they used to work here. The place now looks a bit like a coal refinery or shipping station, and as they talk I find a trap door in the floor with doors made of wood. The whole floor is made of wood, but I think it is my best bet.

Opening the doors to see how low it goes and how big or safe it is, the guy asks me what I’m doing. I tell him I’m looking for a trap door in which I can hide from the fog, and he tries to help. The room below is strange; its like I’m unfolding a letter. Right below the door is immediately the floor, but it has another flap I can open, which opens up to a slightly smaller room, etc.

The guy comes over to help and when he sits in the middle of the opened trap doors on the weird floor we uncovered there, the floor sinks and a fold-down room is revealed beneath the trap door. I jump out of the room before it can settle all the way down, but he is trapped inside; it is actually a pit trap of some kind and he is too deep to get out. I try to reach down to him but as I do some girl who has been lurking around in the dream gets down there with him and bites him.

I believe she is devouring him, and I run away, meeting back up with my family nearby. There is another large group of girls serving us at a restaurant and I recognize the girl who bit the young man, but she doesn’t seem to know me. I am nervous, wondering if they will attack us, but they seem interested only in running their restaurant and giving us service.

That is about the extent of what I remember.

I have been havin’ em but not postin’ em.

I thought I’d share my documents for fun, though… here are the spreadsheets I’ve made. This link will open a download of an MS office spreadsheet for ya. It’s all colorful ant purty etc. Remember I do have more dreams than the numbers shown here; some days I don’t feel like writing them down, and some days I forget. I only record numbers for dreams that are in my written archive.

Why? I don’t know. A few days before I had a sexy TF2 dream with the Sniper and everything. But you know what? The moment I woke up I forgot ALL CONTENT. I knew I’d had the dream and that it was sexy, but what actually happened?  Blank.

BALLS.

Here is last night’s dream also.

Originally Posted September 14^th, 2009

I was in Winners, just shopping around. Lots of people I used to work with were there but none of them recognized me, even though I tried to get their attention. I left the store and was going to my car, when I met someone else I used to go to school with; Jennifer Adams. She was on a motorbike and she came up behind me with it.

We talked for awhile, and she had some other guy with her as well. I remember trying to include him in the conversation as well, and that we just generally talked for awhile. I went into another store with them for a bit and then left again.

When I got back into the parking lot, I was suddenly with Tina and Stormy. We couldn’t find my car and searched for several minutes, until Tina finally noticed that it was just parked in a really really tight space and was sort of hiding behind the other car.

I try to get it to start but I see the hood is up, and Tina wants me to check the oil. I do so, looking for a rag to wipe the dip stick on; I find the jacket of someone else who seems to be inside the store (which has now turned into a house where I have just left a party). I wipe it on their sleeve and pretend nothing happened, knowing full well that they could come out at any moment and want their jacket.

The oil seems to be too full, but I tell Tina to ignore it for now. It seems the parking lot has become a small field or an overgrown yard, and then it is like my car is parked inside some weird and dilapidated old garage. There is another car next to me, and a young Asian male comes out to work on his car. I see he is the owner of the coat I used but he says nothing, merely watching me work with interest while pretending to be busy with his own car project.

I try to close the hood but suddenly something else is wrong. The arm that holds it up has become detached and I don’t want to leave it loose because I remember Kyle telling me ‘if you do that, it’ll shake all over the place while you drive and damage something’. I ask Tina if she knew where it was originally bolted down and she shows me; I try to bolt it there but it takes a long time.

Finally I try to close the hood again but now everything is moved around. I look at Tina and ask her why the hell she moved everything around when she was working on it and did she know how to put it all back, but she just shrugs. I see there are loose wire pieces everywhere and see that Stormy has been putting them there.

I yell at her and ask her why the hell she thought it would be a good idea to lay loose wires on top of a project someone was working on like that, and she starts to cry, saying she just found them in the barn and thought I might like them.

Eventually I get the hood to sort of close and I try to start the car. It turns on, but when I turn the key to the off position the car won’t stop running. It runs slowly through the garage door and then it starts to drive around; it hits things that move and act like people but look like pieces of toast or other weird items.

There is more to this dream, but I can’t remember it all. I know at one point I was inside a house and a kid was locked in the basement as a cruel punishment. I was trying to find my way to him and once I did, his dad, the one who locked him up, saw me and told me to get the hell out of there. I did, and I don’t remember what happened after that.

I do remember opening door that were locked only moments before, that they simply opened in my hands.

I feel like I have something to pour all over this page, but by the time I start I just… lose it.

Not sure what it is. I think I’m feeling that longing that so many others have talked about before; the longing to do something or be somewhere that I can’t explain. Not really sure what it is, but I hope I find it soon because I’m getting a little fed up with it.

Part of it is that I really miss the farm again. I was just there recently of course but now I feel so much like I want to be back! I can’t wait to go out there in the fall and just relax in the grass again… Not sure what it is.

Nothing too important here, mostly just recording feelings for future reference if needs be.

The song from my dream the other night has been bothering me a bit.

I’m trying to get my hands on some kind of music software that I can use to try and reproduce it, even if it’s some cheap little tone maker or something. I just need something I can use to make a little representation of it for others to hear and understand.

I don’t know why it’s in my head; I sing it on and off just to remember it, to keep myself entertained and busy with it.

:/

I was with Crystal. We were in what seemed my parent’s bedroom and we were playing with a doll; it seemed very life-like, and was fashioned after a baby. It wiggled and squirmed, but it seemed to have a really bad attitude. We were not playing very nicely with it either, and after awhile it seemed things were getting kind of twisted.

The doll changed and became smaller, and I became afraid of it and of us. I switched it off but it wouldn’t stay off; it continued to squirm and try to make noises, tried to bite. We take the doll into the living room with my mom and she is there with my sister, working in the dark on the dining table with my sister on some kind of weird project. It looks like an electronics project but we put our doll on the table and it starts to smoke.

I tell my mom about how it won’t stop and how we need to destroy its processor chip, and so she sort of sets it on fire with some kind of chemical for us. Then she hands me some tweezers and I dispose of what remains of the chip that was left on some metal tray. I work it out of its holder and then it seems to be gone.

We leave mom and Nel to their experiment but I see something wrong; Crystal and I are in a room that seems to be lit by a computer’s glow now, and we do not look well. We look like walking mummies or skeletons; we seem drained and drawn, and everything in the room is now wrong, somehow. Twisted. I am the only one who notices at first and I tell Crystal; she finally sees it and we think that our encounter with the doll has done something bad to us.

We sit in this room that seems like our bedroom, and now it seems like I am with Tina and her sister Carrie instead; we all move to some shelves in the living room of my parent’s house, though it’s set up how it used to be a long time ago and not how it is today. We are all looking for stones that will cleanse us, help us come back to who we were and to protect us while we sleep.

I find citrine at first, but as I pick up the flat little piece covered in crystals it splits in half, feeling soft. Carrie has another piece just like that and she purposely splits hers so that Tina can use part of it as well. Then I remember something and I tell them both to wait; I have something better we can use.

I grab from some shelves huge pieces of clear citrine crystals that are either covered in or attached to quartz crystals. I tell her this is so that their power will be amplified and better directed, and to aim the crystals at themselves as they sleep. We all move into a small room full of beds and we all set up our crystals.

I have the hardest time falling asleep it seems; in the dream I wake up and see that one of my smallest points of citrine has fallen off of the top of the bed. I struggle to get it from behind the bed, and I set it back where it belongs. Behind the bed I also see something electronic that seems to call me, to want me or Tina, who sleeps next to me, to pick it up; I resist it somehow though the draw is very hard.

I wake up again to the sounds of Tina and Carrie gently talking behind me. When I look around the bed has changed to make room for tones of plants. I look at Tina and Carrie and the room is clearer, and we all seem better; but I tell them it’s time to fold out the bed/couch and go to sleep. They agree. We have not yet been trying to sleep for the total of an hour.

We have to move all of these plants that came from somewhere out of the way before we can do so; now it seems my mom is helping. I notice that the pots for most of these plants are drab but that the soil is extremely dry. I think that whomever takes care of them does a bad job, and I can see some new woman I don’t recognize helping us move them.

Something seems different here, in this part of the dream. It seems even more disturbing than when we played with the broken doll, more disturbing than when we were as shadows. Now I sing a song before I even realize it, while working.

The song is slow and simple, and I hear drums and a cymbal in the background. “In the welcome. In the welcome. I am for hi-im in the welcome. In the welcome.”

I stop suddenly when I realize what I sing and I wake up. I feel very disoriented and kind of upset. The song sounded quite medieval and I hear my own voice; I hear the drum and the cymbals and I’m kind of put off. Each word was sung on one note, descending a tone each time; the word “him” is stretched out for two beats, and the word welcome is chopped up like WELcome.

Taking down Eighth Heaven, again, lol.

Recycling it into something new!

seemed it was turning others into zombies; something more happened in this dream but I can no longer remember, as I woke up and went back to bed. If you were killed before it finished infecting you, you would revive fully healed and be fine. There were signs that you were infected, such as a discoloring of the eyes, so we all knew.

Each of us became infected and each of us killed the other before we could die; we stabbed each other in the heart with a blade. We all wore long white gowns and had long hair; I remember the pain of being stabbed, hitting the floor, and watching the blood on my hands until I died, thinking there should have been more. Then I would suddenly be conscious and aware again. I would be healthy. But we were infected again, and ended up having to kill each other again. This happened like three times in total.

After the last time something changed; the outbreak in our area seemed to be contained. I was now wearing some kind of robe, it seemed. I was in a place with other people but didn’t know where; it seemed like some kind of palace or something with lots of others bustling about. I heard from one of them gossip about another zombie outbreak like this one in the St. Vital mall, but they seemed to have it under control.

I am walking near a window that suddenly looks like my old bedroom window on the farm and I hear someone else walking outside. I kneel below the window, hoping they didn’t see me, but I can hear two men talking about me outside. They say they know I am there and somehow I know or sense who they are.

I stand up and open the window to speak with them. They are dressed as dark Jedi but it isn’t all that obvious and they don’t yet appear that powerful; I know they are apprentices. I sense in my mind’s eye their masters, and I know they too are walking about this compound, looking for something. One is very powerful physically and has lots of soldiers following him, and the other is thin but dangerous, hiding in his black cloak.

The two apprentices seem very handsome and not all that threatening, and I don’t seem to sense anything bad in them. I tell them about the disease; when I tell them I have been infected they back up a step. They don’t seem to notice I’m a Jedi too, but I go ahead and explain that I’m alright now, and that if you’re killed while infected you can once again be alive and fine somehow.

They go about their business, saying that they are looking for something as well, and I frown as they walk away; I jump out the window and follow them, trying to help. We end up in the old shed on the farm in my parent’s yard, looking through all the crap. I get a picture in my mind’s eye of the disc that they are looking for; it’s something like a CD we might play music with but much smaller.

I find something like what they are looking for but this is a regular CD, not the high tech thing they want, and I leave, wondering why I was helping my enemy look for something. As I walk about the palace, which in the dream has become my parent’s house, I pass on the left side of the house up to the front, as though moving around it to the right side of the house. Just as I get to the corner I come in contact with the apprentice’s two masters.

They don’t seem to notice me at first, but then I realize they simply are not interested; in the garden behind me, back the way I had just came, they had found someone who was like a prince or royalty that we were protecting at this house. He was small and frail, without his shirt on, playing in a huge puddle in the garden. He looked like Justin Smith from high school only super tiny.

I turn and start running for him, knowing they wish to assassinate him; I leap and grab him in my arms just as a barrage of blaster fire from the stronger dark master’s soldiers comes our way. I manage to deflect it with the force somehow; I set the one I’m saving down carefully to keep him near me and I draw my two lightsabers; I have two lilac colored ones.

Just as I do more energy comes my way and I dance gracefully, deflecting all the blaster bolts safely away. I’m not really sure what happens after this but I think the fight continues and changes; I think I woke up again here and tried to go back to sleep again.

I am with my mom now. We are waiting outside a store in the mall and I am skipping school with her; she thinks I need more clothes but she has already spent so much on me that I tell her no, no, it’s ok. Please don’t. I see the woman inside the store who thinks I’m going to be getting a haircut get all anxious, wondering when I’ll finally just get the haircut. I never end up getting it; we move on.

The next thing I remember I am fighting another Jedi, a female; we are both hiding behind something and fighting each other across a distance. I am throwing bits of glass at her that lay around from all the things we’ve destroyed; I raise my hand and as I concentrate I throw it with the force. It seems my abilities are more about energy deflection than they are about hurling items, but I’m hitting her once in awhile.

She laughs; she is more powerful than me but she agrees that if I can hit her a certain number of times she will stop trying to kill the others and will let me go. I agree and immediately start firing off at her; eventually she fires back with a crab made of glass.

I catch it with the force and smash it against the floor until it is all broken, only then realizing that I have given her more ammunition against me; I pay for it, avoiding most of the glass but not all that she throws at me. Then, when I think she is resting I pop out from behind a pillar and raise my hand, this time concentrating hard; I plan to throw a lot of glass at her with more power than I have been.

I close my eyes in my concentration. Big mistake. My world becomes red with pain and blood when I feel a huge amount of glass lodge itself into my extended palm. I have enough sense to dive behind a pillar again afterwards, but as I pull out the glass and deal with the blood, I know I have to be more careful.

I get more sneaky now, only popping out here and there when I sense that she is vulnerable, and eventually she stops, agreeing that I have proven myself. As other people come out to see what’s been going on I collapse to the floor, tired; I’ve been losing a lot of blood. I look at my palm and see all the serrated cuts, though they look more round than they should.

I pull pieces of glass from my hair and near my eyes, and in the dream I see my hair is black. I accidentally pull out lots of eyelashes in the dream too, but they were loose ones that just needed to be pulled away.

As I do that some girl comes up to me, concerned about what happened; we talk about something but I can’t remember what. She is a young girl and I feel like I was protecting her. I can’t remember all the details of this dream anymore, just the fighting and the glass.

Originally posted August 14th, 2009

I don’t remember everything anymore because I slept so badly (on the farm and in intense heat) but here is what I do have.

At one point I was with a group of people that appeared to be a high school class. We were all on some kind of field trip and we were at a dock; we had our feet in the shallow water and we were all watching the creatures in the water come up to us and play with us. There were little fish nibbling at people’s toes, and these funny little salamander-like things that were swimming in a neat way.

I was with Crystal and we backed up along the dock, but as we did a huge spider squeezed out through a hole in the wooden planks. It was a strange spider; like that “happy spider” that has a happy face on its green back. It came at least up to my knees and someone said “that could be someone’s cat”. I laughed and said no way, but I was terrified of it. I kept trying to get away from it, and it kept following me.

It seemed to want me to pet it, and so I did. It was actually a really nice pet and was very soft, but as I touched it its owner came up to me and yelled at me. He started to sterilize where I had touched, saying that it was a very sensitive thing and someone else’s touch could hurt it. He was happy that at least I had only pet it once and in a straight line. It left with its owner.

Before this I think there was a dream where I was with Katie buying groceries in Souris. We were walking down the street with them at night when her brother pulled up in a big old car something like the one he used to drive only John Deer green; he put it in some garage across the street and we went inside as well.

The inside was all painted up and it seemed to be a special place where they parked their cars; it was a huge garage set up for only two cars, and was painted with silly happy faces and blue skies everywhere.

We go out the back, into the back alley where it would be in reality, and there is nothing but junk out here. We are riding around on something and at first I don’t know what it is. As we head more south down this alley we see that we’re in an area where they store old army crap and that there are tanks, hazard suits, all sorts of metal junk and other things around. There is also some young kid walking around dressed as a soldier and he follows our vehicle; I realize it is a tank as well.

He dropes his little bomb on our tank but it is decommissioned and it does nothing, so we just keep moving. He walks alongside us and I tell him I like his outfit, and that the soldier in TF2 seems to be heavily based on it.

Later I remember arguing really badly with my dad because I wanted to go deeper into the scrapyard with my camera and see what was in there but he said it was too dangerous and refused to let me. I didn’t want to disobey his wishes, and so I was very upset that he wouldn’t let me go.

Another dream I had at some point this morning involved me in my old room on the farm, but it still had a closet setup like when my sister had the room. It had lots of little shelves along the west wall and all of my stones were on them.

I was going through them, finding the stones that I felt were more important and taking them with me to put on an altar. In my mind’s eye in the dream I see the altar is a lot like the one I have at home now, but it has lots of pictures on it as well; in the dream I want to change it, make it different.

I collect quite a few stones, including a HUGE piece of selenite. It’s long and thicker than my arm, and I chastise myself in the dream for not realizing in all the years I owned it as a kid that it was selenite. It fades to purple at one end.

I also find a strange cluster attached to a bronze sculpted base. The cluster seems kind of living to me, and I believe it is amber; I can’t see it very well in the dark of the room in my dream but I think at one point that it has little teeth hidden inside.

I find another thing, like a cluster of citrine that is very deep orange and brown, but I call it something else. Like an “elder cluster” or something like that; something with the name cluster in it. I don’t know what it is but I feel reverence for it.

I was cleaning up a little area that was like my old room on the farm; it was down a few steps and had a bedroom off to the right with a small little foyer right there. It even had the same dark wood wall. I had a vacuum and I was cleaning the area up because it seemed, suddenly, that it was very dirty and neglected.

I move into the bedroom to vacuum after getting stuff off of the walls, noticing that the floor was VERY dirty. In the dream I recognized that I had cleaned up not that long ago and that it was strange for the floor to be so dirty so soon.

Vacuuming the bed spread I realized that it, too, was very dirty and sandy. I pulled it away to see if the fitted sheet was also dirty when I saw it. All along the edges of the mattress little insects had sort of buried themselves. They had sunken in maybe half an inch or so and then stopped, making a little slimy hole for themselves. They were the size and shape of little shrimp, and they rather looked like shrimp too; they had little eyes and pink armored backs. They were very slimy and gross.

Kyle shows up and hears me screaming and freaking out, and I just keep pulling the sheets off the fitted sheet, finding more and more insects. Now we see huge leaches crawling around there and other gross disgusting insects, and we don’t know if they were always there and we didn’t know or something like that.

We jump off the bed and realize we have to change our living situation and get a new bed; we didn’t think we lived like dirty people or that these insects had been there more than a day. In the dream we moved in to this house and room only a day or so ago, and we were determined to go see the guy who owned the house, which in the dream seemed to be Tim, to tell him we were leaving. NOW.

As we prepare to leave I see something else wiggling under the bed. I look down and it is another HUGE leach like thing. This one is the length and thickness of my forearm, and it has a little ruffled skirt-like bottom. When it senses that I’ve seen it, it comes towards me extremely quickly, its little mouth gnashing. I scream and run around the bed, and it tries to follow me quickly.

Kyle and I get the hell out of that room and move on to go find Tim; somehow I think the scene changes and we’re in Tim’s kitchen. Joe is there but he says he doesn’t have time for our questions about what kind of bugs they are, and Liz is in the kitchen as well as Crystal and some other guy I don’t recognize. He looks something like Joe.

I say oh, hey, Liz is back from India (she was on a trip to India in reality at this point in time) and I ask if I can talk about something with everyone, but Liz won’t let anyone else talk. She just keeps going and going, and Crystal catches my eye and pulls me aside. I tell her about the bugs.

Now the scene has changed again. Its like we’re in a school room and everyone is getting ready to sit down. I feel my arm getting very itchy and when I look, there is a large circular red mark forming on the underside of my arm; I think it is my left arm. I think that it is from one of those insects having bit me or something, as it appears there are little dots inside of the circle.

As time goes on and I itch the circle a bit, I see that it changes; I look down at it and suddenly a pattern is forming inside of the circle. An intricate cross is forming, and at first I think it is a pentagram. I get up in the middle of class and show it to Crystal on the way out as an explanation of why I am leaving; she seems quite confused.

When I get outside I see that it isn’t a pentagram. It is some sort of star but the lines used to draw it’s points seem to double in the middle and form an intricate weave pattern. The whole image is raised from my skin, almost like a perfect brand, but it no longer hurts. It has text underneath it as well now, something about ghosts, zombies and demons.

I wander around outside, confused. It’s dark now and I see little buildings on the school grounds. Near one of them a man is coming out; it is his office, he is a teacher, and he is on his way to school. I don’t really recognize him but somehow I know he knows what’s going on, so I follow him for a bit. He stops on the little porch in front of the school room I had left and I show him my arm; he tells me that it’s my destiny to stop the beings that are outlined on my arm. In this case, vampires, ghouls, and demons.

I ask him “are you fucking kidding me?” but just as I do I see a vampire and a few zombies climbing the steps to get into the porch with us, and I move into action. I have some kind of weapon in my hands and I attack them; there is blood everywhere and I’m a poor fighter at first, but eventually I kill them all.

I forget what happens beyond this point. I woke up here, and when I fell asleep again I had another dream. I don’t remember much about this one either, except that I was in school again and we were skiing in some snow covered hills somewhere. I was reluctant to try but I went down the bunny hill sitting on top of my skis.